The Cost of Peace, The Price of War

I want to share this because it really impacted me. One of my new friends in San Diego is a marine grunt (infantry) and The other night he was telling me about being in Afghanistan. What he told me changed the way I viewed our military, I viewed the war and viewed my friend.

He only served one full tour in Afghanistan. He counts him self among the extremely lucky in the Marines. He has PTSD, like many or most that come back. He explained it wasn't from the fighting, he was never wounded and by comparison didn't see too much crazy stuff go down. He was explaining it is the stress. Every time you take a step you don't know if it will be your last, if there is an IED, if you will randomly get shot or blown up as a car passes. Every single waking second is filled with the realization that you could die any second and it wouldn't be abnormal. You reach a point where you break and you don't fear it anymore, you actually start to hope you get to be the lucky guy who gets torn in half by the IED or taken out by a bullet. You just pray it's fatal.

He was talking about how combat is nothing like you expect. You don't see them, you just hear gun shots, you have an idea of the direction and then your entire platoon opens fire in that direction just spraying and praying. It goes "pew pew"....pause..."BOOM BOOM TAT TAT ASDSADFKSSDFNNSAFSDF" (every gun going off) and then dead silence. He emphasized this point, complete silence. Not a couple little *bangs* form a few guns, everyone stops in an instant. It goes from pure chaos to nothing in the blink of an eye. He pointed out that recent movies have done a great job of capturing modern warfare and battles, but this is the one thing he has never seen them get right, they are always just a little off, like it is something that can only be done right when it is real. In about 30 seconds they just dropped 1400+ bullets into a mountainside. One bullet hit one person they were shooting at and it didn't even kill him.

 Everyone is in a single file line for the most part and about 10-20 yards apart (in case of IEDS). He heard gunfire at him and could see the branches directly above him (under tree) getting cut down. He realized he was only feet away from tiny metal pieces of death. They could have aimed an inch lower and got him. How easy it is to die, how easy it is for another person to kill, but yet somehow he was still standing unharmed.

He was in a city and a guy turned a corner and pointed an RPG at them and fired, but he forgot to take the diamond tip off it (what prevents it from exploding on you) and they watched it bounce past them, they turn to the guy and he just drops the weapon and puts his hands up, the commanding office just looks at him and fires, guy dies. We react to that partially as "how cruel, he gave up." But not a one of them batted an eye or gave it a second thought, no one even cared. He just try to kill them, it is just simpler and legal to fire back. He said they became so desensitized to death it just doesn't even matter anymore. A lot of the time people firing at them aren't even real insurgents, just locals wanting to brag to their friends that they took shots at the American. It is pretty much a penis measuring competition at times.

He told me stories of his friends that died or got injured. When he was talking about it all he was a ghost. I have hung out with this guy multiple times, funny, light hearted, jovial, a real fun guy. But when he talked about it he changed everything. His voice, his posture and most of all his eyes. His he spoke slowly, just like how people speak when they are trying to remember and explain a dream they had the night before. His posture was slumped, he looked defeated, like he has given up on something and finally his eyes, they looked like a ghost. They were filled with only two things: the past and horrible memories. He wasn't looking at us, he couldn't see us. When he told those stories he was seeing them again like watching the TV. He was in a different world, he was returning to a nightmare that he can never fully escape. 

I want to retell a few of those stories, but I just don't think I can. I think those are his stories to tell, they were his friends, his brother-in-arms. ha, brother-in-arms. I always thought I knew what that meant. You are in the trenches together, you are close, like brothers. But I realized that, though I am not wrong, that I still didn't understand it at all. I am close to my brothers; I love them dearly and consider them two of my best friends. But a brother-in-arms can be even closer. They shared the most terrible moments of their lives together. They will always be able to understand one another in a way none of the rest of us can, not even their real brothers. They will understand and forgive them when they have PTSD, when they freak out to fireworks going off, to when they get angry over nothing, but yet are angry at everything. They won't pity them, they won't sympathize, they will do something only a brother-in-arms can do, empathize. They know when they look at each other, no matter how calm and peaceful they seem on the outside, they are sharing the same hell on the inside. Some will grow past it, some will forget or remember it as a hazy dream from a different world, some will be strong for years until they get older and, like my Grandfather who fought in WW2, will wake up screaming because the only thing they see when they sleep are the ghosts of their past, the ghosts of the ones who didn't get lucky enough to see old age and some will make it back home from these countries, from these wars but they won't see old age either. I think we sometimes forget that it isn't just bullets or bombs that kill and wound our soldiers. Sometimes the emotional wounds are just as bad and worse. Sometimes the emotional wounds are fatal too.

I just want to say thank you to every single member of the armed forces, abroad and domestic. Thank you for your sacrifice, thank you for doing what so many of us are too selfish or scared to do. I want our troops to come home now and stay home. I used to want them home for economic reasons, but now I want them home not for me, but for them. I don't want to see one more solider lose their arm or leg or life. I don't want one more Mother to bury her son or Father his daughter because we are in a country that we shouldn't have had to be in the first place. I don't want the US to be the world’s police anymore. Whether it is our job or not, it just isn't worth the cost anymore.

Home At Last - The End to My European Adventure

I left Budapest shortly after the wedding with a heavy heart. I fell in love with this city. It took me in when I needed it most, it accepted me and gave me some of the best times of my life. But I left it proud and happy. I was leaving it knowing my adventure here was over, that I accomplished what I came to do and would be back someday.

I flew from Budapest to Switzerland, where I would enjoy a few days of sightseeing and then my flight home. Now Zurich is insanely expensive. To put it in perspective, the minimum wage equals $18. Yeah....crazy. Luckily for me I had a friend living there who I could stay with! Now my friend is Claudia, another German who is good friends with Anna. Claudia also living in Kansas when Anna did (different family) and we had the privilege of getting to know her as well as Anna.

On top of that Dave and Aileen were finishing up their trip in Zurich as well. So I spent the first half of my day exploring the city and the second half I met up with them for some more sightseeing and drinks. Claudia later joined us for dinner and we all had a blast. But after my 2 days in the city it was time for me to return to the United States for the first time in exactly 4 months.

I landed in Rome on September 12th at 8am. I would land in Kansas City on January 12th, 7pm. But getting home was not that simple.

Now, I know I had over stayed my VISA by a few days, I did not realize it was by 18 days.... I was hoping the Swiss wouldn't notice as I try to get through the airport, but they are to well organized for that. While I am trying to get to the International part of the airport I get stopped and escorted back to the "security" area to talk to immigration officials. After some conversation and sitting, I get slapped with a $750 fine. Now, I have just spent 4 months pack backing around Europe on my own, I felt pretty invincible at this point. I decide to try and haggle.

I look at him and say, "well, what happens if I don't pay?" He looks at me confused as if he has never heard that question before. He says I will be ban from the EU for 5-10 years. I say, "Well, we can't have that, can we? but I don't have $750, I just spent 4 months backpacking Europe...I'll give you $200." He again is startled by my counter-offer and says he needs to discuss it with others. He comes back with a new price $600. We go back and forth until we agree on $450. I could tell he was getting more and more confused during this process. He isn't exactly sure why he is negotiating with someone who is illegally in their country, in their possession, but yet he is. The best part, I just put it on a credit card anyway.

After that they let me go and I get onto my plane for my flight home. It was a nice 7 hour flight to Philadelphia. The best part was the complete lack of people on the plane. I had an entire middle row to my self to sleep on. I got to enjoy a few movies and some god-awful airplane food. When I landed and was going through customs I couldn't wipe the grin off of my face. I was back in the States and going to be home soon.

Now I have been warned about reverse culture shock. People and places are not going to be the same as I remember them, I am going to be looking at American culture from a new perspective. As I get to the gate area to wait for 4 hours for my next flight the first thing I notice is the smell. I smelled fat food. I know this sounds weird, but in Europe they eat unbelievably healthier than we do in America. I could smell the fattening food from the food court. It honestly grossed me out and I was hungary, but couldn't make my self go get something to eat. Everything looked so greasy and unappealing. I felt unhealthier just being there. It was weird feeling out of place in my own culture. It was one of the first realizations of how Europe changed me.

Trying my luck I decided to see if I can somehow get bumped to an earlier Kansas City flight. There was one earlier that I could have barely made, but didn't want to risk it. I noticed it was delayed. I ask one of the US Airway desk attendants about my chances. I explain my situation and say I totally understand if it is not possible, but if it is I would love to see my family that much sooner. She looks and tells me it doesn't look possible. I was a little bummed, but no big deal. About 15 minutes later she calls me up, hands me a ticket for the earlier flight and says "go to the Gate asap, it leaves in 30 minutes. I booked you on it for no extra charge, but left you still on your previous flight incase something goes wrong." I was so stunned, this never happens with American airline companies. She kind lady was my angel and I couldn't express my gratitude enough to her. It was going to make a 2.5 hour different in getting home. I called to let my parents know and hopped on a plane.

Now the downside was my checked bags weren't coming till the later flight, but luckily for me my amazing brother and sister-in-law were flying in to KC later that night and offered to pick them up. I got home around 8pm and could not keep my eyes open to save my life. I had woken up at 7am in Europe, which was midnight in the States. It was 3am for me and I don't know if I have ever felt that tired. I crawled into my incredibly comfortable bed and went to sleep. And then I woke up at 4am wide awake. I forced my self to stay in bed until at least 6am. The week of getting up at 6am and being wide awake was incredible. I wish so much I was a morning person, but after a week I was back to normal.

I still can't believe I did it. I can't believe I lived my dream. I quit my great job, spent my saving and spent 4 amazing months seeing Europe making new friends and making older friends even better ones. I am so blessed that I have friends and family that supported me on this adventure. I am even more excited to continue the adventure that is life, now with a new perspective, conquered fear and an excitement I had never found before.

Thank you for everyone who read my story. It has been 7 months since I returned to the United States and though I took a break from blogging, I think it is time I start again. My adventure keeps going every day, so why not bore you all with it. :-)

The End is Coming - Part 2 to the Conlusion

Now I had a short stay in Hungary again before my next trip. I kept enjoying my adventures of exploring the city. One of the best nights we had was a trip to the famous hot springs of Budapest. It was crazy to think that we were sitting in thermal heated baths that were used by the Roman Legionnaires 2000 years ago. Kind of a humbling thought.

We also took a trip to Edit's parents place in Kamahaza to restock our supply of Tokaji wine. While there we took a train into Debrecen, the second largest city in Hungary. It was considerably smaller, but had a nice feel to it. They have a gorgeous University and a historical looking downtown. We met up with one of Matt's former roommates that lives there and enjoyed a nice lunch.

Shortly after our return to Budapest I was off again. This time to Turkey. Now I could write and write on Turkey. I spent a full week there in Istanbul. It was easily the largest city I have ever been to (12-16 million). And what I didn't know until going there is that the city is the continental divide between Europe and Asia. Half the city is in one and half the other. I had this amazing moment when I was sitting on the bank overlooking the sea and looking at the Asian side and I realized that I am literally sitting on the edge of Europe. I have sat on both ends of the United States and the edge of Europe.

The city was beautiful, the people very different and the culture mind boggling at times, but I am really glad I went and visited. I have never been to a non-western country and felt like just going there and learning more about it had a profound impact on how I view the world and other cultures. I started to see how some of the differences between our cultures have created a great deal of misunderstandings between us. I think if we all tried harder to learn about and understand others cultures from THEIR perspective, not our own our world would be a better place.

After a week in Istanbul, a boat ride to a remote island with no cars and some other crazy adventures I was ready to leave. Though when I got back to Hungary I was leaving the next morning for Germany again, haha. I enjoyed a nights sleep and a change of cloths and then back in the air!

I landed in Frankfurt and was greeted by Matt and his Dad. I cannot thank the Shaws enough for their generosity in letting my stay with them. I was struggling a little bit about missing Christmas with my family and they made me feel like one of the family right away. We all had a blast. It was days filled with laughter, jokes, deep conversations and exploration of a new city. Christmas eve we went to the church service on the military base. It was nice to have be surrounded by English speakers again for the holiday, also strange. It is a very weird feeling when I felt confused by being able to understand everyone for once.

Christmas day was a riot. We enjoyed an amazing breakfast followed by dinner and boardgames. The Shaws were even kind enough to get me a Christmas present, which was more than they needed to do. It was honestly one of my favorite Christmas days I have ever had. The day after Christmas a few of the friends started getting in for the wedding. Dave and Aileen Barnes, along with Kieran and Laurie McBride. This just added to the fun as I now had some more American friends to explore Germany with.

Finally, I headed by to Budapest with Matt to help him prepare for both the wedding and the onslaught of Americans that were getting ready to arrive. Shortly after our friends started getting there, including my good friend Greg Brink. Let me tell you, Greg and I had beyond an amazing time together. Most of the Americans visiting were couples, so Greg and I paired up and owned that city. We adventured, we drank, we recovered from drinking in the hot springs (best idea ever).

Amazingly, the week was the best week of my life. My three favorite days all happened in that short span. New Years with Matt and Edit (champagne, fireworks, new years pretzels), Matt's bachelor party [Censored] and Matt and Edit's wedding.

After the wedding was far less fun. Hungarians have a tradition of drinking and the tradition is only amplified during weddings. The 3 hour car ride the next day was one of my least favorite memories. Not to mention when Greg and I got back to my apartment we were locked out. I guess our landlord decided to come into our apartment while we were gone (illegal) and locked both locks (only have key to one). He wasn't home and his phone was off. My phone was out of minutes, I had a few dollars on Skype to make phone calls but my iPad was 5% from death. Greg and I spent 2 hours hung over, laying in a hallway. Not my finest moment. Luckily Matt was able to track down our landlords mother (I know...I know) and she got ahold of him to come let us in. He had the gaul to get frustrated with us for not carrying both keys. My response was, "DON'T GO INTO OUR APARTMENT?!?!!"

Well, I Guess I should Finish the Story, shouldn't I? Part 1

At this point, 7 months later, I really am finishing my story more for my self than anyone who was reading my adventures.

After returning from Paris to Budapest I enjoyed the comfort of "going home" to Budapest. The truth is around that time Budapest really started to feel like home to me. Kansas City will always be my true home, but I had something in Budapest I have never acquired before. I felt ownership of the city. When I remember Budapest, I remember it like a good friend. I don't just see the beautiful buildings, the kind people, the raging Danube, I see the soul of the city. I see it smiling at me, welcoming me back.

To add to my treat of coming back it was Thanksgiving, which sadly is not celebrated much in Europe....Gees, they must be crazy. But luckily for me Matt's parents just happened to come celebrate this holiday with us and as an added bonus, they brought a turkey and some traditional American food from the military base his Dad works on in Germany. While we hung out at Edit's apartment, talked, watched football, the amazing Beth Shaw cooked us an amazing Thanksgiving dinner.

Now, I had one more trip planned, to Southern Germany and then I was heading back to the States for Christmas. This was bittersweet, since Matt and Edit's wedding was in early January and I had become so close to not just them, but their families. But my VISA was going to expire and I was running out of money. But I couldn't shake this feeling that if I left now I would regret it. I didn't feel like my adventure was done. So I talked to my awesome Mom and her response was "You can have Christmas with us every year, but you will regret it if you miss this wedding." I could never ask or imagine a more amazing Mother than mine. Supports me when I want to quit my job and backpack Europe. Encourages me to live my life to its fullest everyday.

So without telling Matt I change my flight (sadly another $500, but worth it). The next day we are over at Edit's with the Shaws and I tell Matt and Edit that I have their wedding present already and it seems fitting to give it to them now. I hand Matt an envelope with my changed flight itinerary in it. He looks confused and reads it over and I could see the moment when he realized exactly what it was. I told him that due to its cost, this might be the only one they get from me. And I can tell you deciding to stay was one of the best decisions I made.

No what I had to figure out was first, what am I going to do for Christmas? Being as blessed as I am the Shaw's immediately offered to take me in and let me celebrate it with them in Heidlburg, Germany. Edit's family offered to let me spend it with them as well and a few other families in Europe all offered. I can't tell you how lucky I am to have not only had such an amazing European adventure, but to have all these amazing families willing to let me spend the holiday with them. I decided to spend it with the Shaws, since I was looking forward to seeing Matt's brothers who are good friends of mine and see a new part of Germany.

Shortly after this weekend I left for Munich and Southern Germany for a week. I spent 2 days in Munich seeing this beautiful city. Now, I had been to Munich as a kid and have a series of memories from it and was looking forward to how many of those matched up to the present. I did a walking tour and just enjoyed this amazing city. I enjoyed the famous Bavarian Beer, which lives up to its name. And enjoyed watching the famous clock tower in the city center do its noon show.

There were two interesting facts that stood out to me that I didn't know. Firstly, the Nazi moment of the 1920/30s started in Munich. Secondly, only about 4 buildings in the city are the originals from before World War 2 and they are the four tallest. See, precise bombing was difficult during that time period. What the bombardiers used as a reference point was the tallest buildings, so they made sure not to destroy them. But luckily, the city of Munich kept such detailed records of the city and its buildings that they were able to recreate the city in almost its entirety.

After my few days in Munich I was going to visit two of my friends Anna and Volker and their one year-old Leo. They live about two hours away in Ravensburg. Anna was an exchange student with my Grandparents when I was 13. She became family instantly and we still stay in close contact 13 years later. Volker came and picked me up and we enjoyed a nice scenic drive down the autobahn. I enjoyed a few calm days in a beautiful, smaller Germany city. We visited Anna's family a few hours North one day as well.

One of the best parts of this trip was our visit to Nue Schawnstein Castle! This was my favorite place when I was a kid. It is the famous Sleeping Beauty castle built in Southern Germany by the "Mad" King Ludwig the II. It was as breath taking as I remembered. Nestled on a mountain top, surrounded by cliffs.

Anna was kind enough to drive me back to Munich a few days later for my flight back to Budapest. This was one of my calmest but favorite trips in Europe. Just spending time with people close to you, enjoying the food, the winter festivals and the great food.

Last Day in Paris

My last day in Paris and yet I still have so much to see. I start the day off with the same walk through the city, but take a few different streets and alleys, but yet end up in the same spot. What great city planning. Like a maze, except it always leads you right back to the center if you get lost.

I first go to the Louvre. So much great artwork to see. Once I get inside I understand why they say you can spend a lifetime in the Louvre and still never see it all. I decided to pick out the famous pieces and head straight to them, admiring other pieces as I went. Of course the highlight was the Mona Lisa. I feel privileged to have seen it in the flesh. But in truth, it was very small and uninspiring. I appreciated more that I was looking at a work of Leonardo Di Vinci more than the work its self. Still worth it.

After this I wander from famous piece to famous piece, which are properly spread out giving me a pretty full tour. After about 2.5 hours I am exhausted and ready to leave. From the Louvre I wander to Notre Dame. I don't go inside, but I buy a crepe and eat it outside! It is on this walk I have my adventure with the scam artist. For more on that, read my post on getting scammed. One of my favorite memories from my trip by far.

After Notre Dame I walk to the modern art museum, which looks awesome and completely out of place in this city. It is a series of colored tubes and pipes sticking out of an industrial looking building made of glass and steel. I didn't go inside, but outside was fun enough. You have artists all over, musicians, cheap back massages, and anything else you can think of. It was just fun to sit in the sun and take it all in.

While wondering I found that there is a "history of video games expo" in town. I don't know if you know me, but I kind of love video games. A lot. So I head there, which is not as easy as it seems because I am an idiot. After walking to the wrong buildings all over town, being completely exhausted, feeling like my legs are dead and the sun setting I find the place. I pay the overly-priced fee and go inside. It was pretty cool I must say. I ran through the history, while allowing you to play famous games from every era of gaming. but the exhibit was pretty short, which was sad and made the cost-benefit even lower, but oh well.

After this I head back to the apartment. Tonight I am going out to dinner in a real Parisian restaurant with Isabel and her husband. It is a small place and we sat there for hours on end, eating amazing food and drinking french wine. What better French experience could I ask for? What a perfect way to end the trip and I am glad we did it.

Sadly, the next morning I return to Hungary. I say good-bye to everyone, which is sad. Even in the small time I spent with them I grew to like the family, very, very much. I plan to stay in touch with Paul and Clemence through Facebook. I told them they can keep practicing their English with me until I finally convince them to visit the States.

No post on the trip home - it was uneventful, but great to be back in my apartment after 20 days on the road.

Back To The France Story

So you may be thinking "Tom...you were in France 2 months ago, we don't care," or "Dang Tom, you are lazy and slow, but write away because I am going to read it anyway." To the latter, thank you. To the first, my only advice is to stop reading here, but please click on some ads on the way out.

So, for my first full day in Paris I did what anyone would do, walk around and be utterly amazed at its beauty. Paris has always been on my list of cities to visit, not because I had a deep desire to see it, but merely because it is one of the worlds great cities. This trip changed all of that. I finally understood why it is one of the great cities. It is grand, beautiful, elegant and classy, while at the same time having a local, artsy almost grungy feel. In two simple words Paris is uniquely magnificent.

I could do nothing else but just wander random, average streets and still feel like I have visited a completely new world. It is a crazy thing when the average is breath taking. So many cities are beautiful and amazing, but Paris is just so different. In other cities you can see where the first plan for the city started, the design. But then you can see how a new idea or designer came in and started to reshape it. Still beautiful, but you can view it in chunks of time periods or designers. But Paris is so different. It looks like in the start one person put down a master plan for the city and no one ever broke from it. That doesn't mean the style doesn't change or alter with time periods or the type of district it is, but it feels that the original planner designed the city to do exactly that. Every brush stroke painted, every new building built, regardless of whom did them, was just fulfilling the original master plan. And what brings the entire city together? The Eiffel tower right in the middle. Like a shinning beacon providing a guiding light to the middle of the majestic city.

I started my day walking from where I was staying to the city center. Down different streets and alleys. I passed right by the Moulin Rouge and through the art district. One of the things I immediately knew I liked about the city was that blocks were themed by store. I walked down an entire street dedicated to selling musical instruments. One for books, etc. In other cities you spread out stores, but here they condensed them into single streets. There is a unique fun to it that overwhelms my business sense wanting to correct them on it from a sales strategy.

I eventually make it down to the city center, after passing the Opera House, some amazing churches, and a Greek looking temple which I will assume is very famous by is sheer size and location. The city center is incredible. You have two Egyptian obelisks next to matching fountains while thousands of cars drive by. To one direction you have a park that ends in the Louve, to the other the famous long street ending in the arch and to another direction you see the Eiffel Tower just sitting in the distance.

I walk down the long street to the arch. I don't want to pay to go up it, so I just walk around and take the typical tourist photos. I continue down my path, now heading to the Eiffel tower. Along the way I find a bakery and enjoy some actual "french bread." It lives up to its name. The best bread I have ever eaten was in fact, in Paris.

I pass the Iranian Embassy, something I have never seen before. It is the only one on the street with police in front of it (I wonder why....oh yeah...). Finally I reach the Eiffel Tower. I take a series of photos and then decide to climb it. Climbing the stairs is both cheaper and less waiting. After a tiring walk I get to the first floor and it has a good view of the city, but nothing great. I decide to go to the second floor. About equal distance walking, but much better view. Now, I won't lie - at least right now - I haven't met someone who I told I walked both flights to that wasn't impressed and surprised.

Once there you can pay extra to take an elevator to the very top. Thinking it is worth it since I am here, I go for it. The view is amazing and if you visit, worth paying extra for. You can see the entire city and far past it. I spend an hour or so at the top just looking around the city and then looking again. I reflect, think and appreciate. I can do nothing but feel thankful that I am there right then seeing what I am seeing. If you ever here my complain about life, slap me and remind me of that single moment. I have no right to complain about anything in life, but appreciate.

After this I take the long walk home. I could go on and on about the buildings I saw, the places I visited, but there are so many. Every building I walked past feels like it deserves mention, but this post is long enough as is.

Hungarian Weddings Put US Weddings to Shame

This last weekend I had the amazing opportunity to experience my first foreign wedding. My roommate of 4 months, Matthew Shaw, married the love of his life, Edit Shaw. Matt tried to explain time after time that Hungarians know how to throw a wedding. That it makes the ones back in the States look more like a tea party than a wedding. And he was more right than I could have imagined.

The wedding was held in a town of 15,000, near Edit's home village in Eastern Hungary. There were about 200 people in attendance, 50 or so being Americans. In Hungary, the weddings are a giant party, starting even before the ceremony. Here are two important facts. First, they have a master of ceremonies that runs the show (funny guy). Second, the wedding lasted 14 hours, start to finish.

Starting at 2:30pm everyone meets at the resort we having the non-ceremony parts at. The bride and groom show up and greet everyone and then after an open bar and buffet there is a ceremony were the bride and groom say good-bye to their families, the hug and kiss because as of today they are starting a new family. It was a really cool tradition. There is where the two families approve of the union of give their children up to start a new family.

Then at 4:30pm we went to the church. It was a Catholic wedding, held in a 400-year old church that has recently been renovated. This place was incredible. So beautiful and to add icing to the top, it wasn't just a Priest doing the ceremony, it was the Bishop of all of Eastern Hungary. This guy just happens to be Edit's Uncle and this was one of the 3 weddings he will perform in a year. Beautiful, ancient church, wedding conducted by a Bishop. Already I don't know how I will top this wedding. It was a full mass, in Hungarian, which made it that much cooler.

After they are married, everyone goes outside and greets the bride and groom and then we take a giant group picture. (Why don't we do that in the States?) Then we head back to the resort for the party.

We start off with our first full dinner. 4 course meal, plus desert. Oh yeah, the open bar is still going too. We eat, listen to speeches, the master of ceremony tell jokes that do not translate well and have a good time. (This is where I start drinking palinka....)

After an hour or two the dancing starts. And everyone dances. The oldest of the old and the youngest of the young. There is a live band playing, mixing Hungarian music with American. All the while we continue to enjoy the open bar.

Around 11pm my favorite hungarian tradition starts. At some point during the wedding the groom's friends must kidnap his bride and create a feat that he must overcome to win her back. Normally, they make the groom drink a bunch of shots, or sing a song. But Matt had given me the responsibility of planning this one and I will not let him down. I decide this is where we mix America with a hungarian tradition.

We kidnap Edit off the dance floor (about 15 of us) and wait in the hallway as the Master asks Matt where his bride has gone. After a few minutes we are called back in, except this time his 15 friends are armed with plastic swords and shields. I present Matt a plastic sword, shield and axe. I tell him that his friends approve of his bride (thus why we stole her), but now he must prove he is worthy of her....by defeating all 15 of us in combat. The band kicks on the euro techno music and the fight begins (see my Facebook page of the video). After a valiant battle Matt manages to slay all of us while unharmed and goes and retrieves his bride, a hero.

The Hungarians loved it. They had never seen something like it. The Master of Ceremonies said he had never seen anything like it, but liked it so much he will be including it in his info packets for ideas for future weddings that hire him. That is right, I helped start a possibly new Hungarian tradition.

After this we continue drinking and dancing. Then at midnight they bring us our second full dinner. The midnight dinner. We eat, dance and drink some more. Matt says, drink till you are drunk, dance till you are sober and eat till you are full and just keep repeating this process.

At around 4am there is only about 5 of us left on the floor and the party shuts down. So it started at 2:30pm and ended at 4am. I don't care if a marry a Hungarian girl or not, I want a Hungarian wedding.

Best. Wedding. Ever.

My Extremely Long Travel To Paris

I have a 7am flight leaving Dublin to Paris. Should only take 1.5 hours, lands an hour outside Paris, so I should get into town around 10am. Boy was I wrong.

Now, I lucked out in Paris because one of my Mom's co-workers offered to house me while I am there. She and her family live in the city. They say the room isn't much, but hey, it is free, I won't complain. It isn't like my hostel will be any better.

We take off on time and prepare to land. As we land I note that the clouds are really thick. We have been descending for quite a while, I feel I should be able to see the ground or lights or something. Then I finally see the ground, about 50 feet below the plane and it is not a runway, it is buildings. At that exact point the pilot goes full throttle and the plane rapidly starts to climb back up. Once we are above the clouds again the pilot says it is zero visibility and that we just experienced a "missed approach." So pretty much, we about landed, but not on the runway. Easily, the most nerve racking flight experience I have had.

We circle around for about 45 minutes hoping for better weather below but it never comes. We end up having to land at a different airport 2 hours North of this one....so 3 hours North of Paris. We land there with no problem. Everyone gets funneled into buses for the 2 hour drive to the airport we were supposed to land at.

We get rushed on so fast that I don't use the bathroom, which I needed to. I think to myself that isn't a problem, these buses all have their own. Well I found out the hard way that this ones is broken....not good. In the world of bladders, I am Thumbalina. Small. After a bit, I finally convince the driver to make a pit stop, as others have requested a bathroom break as well. That and I am literally go to pee myself otherwise.

We didn't piss away all of the bus ride though. (see what I did there...yeah, creative). Our driver was pretty cool and funny. He gave the microphone to one Italian guy on the bus who gave us a tour of the area. Not knowing anything about where we are he just told us what was on our left and right, followed by making up stories about it. Pretty funny. The front of the bus was a party section, the back was for lazy, sleeping people.

We finally get to the airport and then I hop onto ANOTHER bus for the hour ride to Paris. It turned out alright though, as I got to sit next to two very beautiful Swedish girls visiting friends in Paris. I had a good conversation with them the whole way, while they fed me candy they brought from Sweden for their friends. Sadly, they just handed me the candy, versus actually feeding it, but you take what you can get, right?

I finally get into Paris and immediately find the subway system. I have basic directions to apartment I will be staying at. I get there with little problem, minus walking past it about 3 times looking for the address. Apparently, I am not always the smartest person or at least most observant. When did I arrive? 5pm - 7 hours later than I was expected. There goes a day in Paris.

I get in and Isabell (the Mom) is waiting for me. She is working from home this week. This isn't uncommon on my Mom's company, but I realize she is doing it just for me, which is super nice. She claims it is because she has late afternoon meetings and they get kicked out of the office at 5pm no matter what.

I also meet her daughter, Clemence (18) and her son Paul (14). After all of this I sit down on the couch and before I realize it, I am out cold. So, think about it. Here I am, I just showed up at these peoples apartment, whom I have never met. I meet them and then fall asleep. not 6 feet away, Isabell is working on her computer. I wake up at one point to find a blanket on me. Here is the best part, this in no way bothered or weirded me out. I feel like that is a sign I am progressing from novice traveller.

After a two hour nap I wake up and am ready to go! Isabell is cooking a traditional French meal, which won't be ready for awhile. So Clemence decides to take me to a local cafe for a glass of wine. She steers us away from the tourist ones and instead takes us to a local place she frequents. I very much appreciate this, as I like to see the real culture more. I enjoy my first glass of French wine. I get a Bordeaux of course, what else? I talk to Clemence and find out more about her and France. She finished high school last year and is doing a special two-year program before University. So, you can go to University, but almost everyone can do that. But there is also a tier above that, pretty much a few Ivy League schools. In order to get into those, you have to do two-years of prep work, then take an exam and hope to get accepted. She choose that path. Hardcore..... She studies 7 days a week. Is in class usually from 8-5pm, then comes home and sits studying for at least another 4 hours. She takes exams on weekends all the time. It made me feel like the laziest person in the world, but that is okay. Either way, impressive.

It is a fun conversation. She keeps apologizing for her English (which is quite good) and I keep explaining her English is good. I noticed something about Europeans. Most of them are very self-conscious about their English. They think they are not very good, when often they are very good. I am just impressed they speak two languages when I struggle with one.

After a bit we head back up to the apartment. They live in the art district, in the Northern part of Paris. It is beautiful and very classic Paris in terms of shops, architecture, etc. They live less than 1/2 a kilometer from Moulin Rouge.

When we get back dinner is ready. The Dad isn't home yet, but they don't expect him. He has is own architecture firm and teaches architecture at a University as well. He works 12+ hours a day.

We enjoy a delicious dinner, some wine and good conversation. They ask me all sorts of questions about America, my trips, etc. I ask them about France, Paris, and what I should see. Paul won't speak much English yet. I can tell her is too nervous, but I think he can speak it well, I just need to get him out of his bubble. He loves the Simpsons and video games. We have enough in common that it won't be hard. He started learning English from both of those two things. Not uncommon. I have met multiple Europeans that learned English from Video games. One from rap music.

After dinner the Dad gets home. I talk to him for awhile and then everyone, including my self finally hits the hay after a long, long day.

Ireland Day 2, 3 and 4

My second day in Dublin was pretty uneventful, though still nice. This is a city you can really explore in one day if you want to. The night life is more of what makes Dublin unique.

I took advantage of not having to get up for a flight to sleep in. After I got up, got fed and ready I decided to just wander the city. I am starting to feel better, but still sick. I wander all over the city, at one point stumbling past Google's EU HQ. Sadly, no tours or random visits.

I walk past a few museums, nothing special. The highlight was probably the few city parks I walked through. Absolutely beautiful. In one of them I found a good spot and just sat for an hour thinking about the trip, life and anything else that popped into my head at the moment.

That night the Canadian guy, French guy, myself and two of the American girls from the night before went to a pub near by. After getting there I found it is famous for being the oldest pub in all of Dublin. Small, cozy and lined with dollar bills where people have written where they are from. The five of us have a good time talk about just about anything. Still tired I call it a night around 11pm. I have to be up early the next day....sadly.


Day 3

Today I decide to do a full-day tour of Western Ireland. I get up at 6:30am so I can be at the bus stop by 7am. We take a general bus to the city of Galaway, in which we get picked up by a smaller tour bus. The first ride takes about 2.5 hours, half of which I sleep.

Our first stop is the family's farm. They have tour businesses, these tours, which run everyday of the year except Christmas.....everyday....holy crap. The other is their farm, which is cows. Mostly they breed them and sell off the babies. But to have all these cows you have to have lots of land, which they do. This land also happens to be in a part of Ireland called the (something mountains). Really cool mountains and hills. Very beautiful. We hike around in them, learn about the history, etc. Then we go back to the house and have home made apple pie and carrot cake the Mother of the family made fresh.

Our next stop is the legendary cliffs of Moar. Takes an hour or so to get there. We luck out too, because the weather is pretty nice. Normally, this time of year is terrible in Ireland, but it has been warm enough that I have taken my jacket off. The cliffs are a little colder though and the jacket comes back on. It is a little foggy so our view over the see if pretty limited, but they explain we are lucky because our view of the cliffs is great. Getting this good of a view at this time of the year is less than 50/50.

I walk up and down the cliffs. I find the sign that does don't enter, but notice there is an even better path farther along the cliffs on the other side and there is no wall to stop you from leaning over the edge! So naturally I jump the wall and walk along that path, being careful to stop to the side on the parts where the land has clearly given away and dropped into the sea. (I am chuckling as I know my Mom will be chewing me out later for this). But! I was not the only one with this idea, plenty of other people were walking it, so it can't be that dangerous....right?

After the cliffs we head along the coast and see the scenery change. I am not sure what it is called, but we stop at another section of coast with a pretty cool landscape. The coast is solid rock and all torn up. Looks really cool and is fun to walk on. Only about 20-30 feet above the sea too.

After this we finally head back to Galaway and have 1.5 hours to walk around the city before our bus takes us back to Dublin. It is dark and a cold front have come in, must to my disappointment. I wander the city center, visit some shops before they close (do not get locked-in any of them).

I finally catch the bus and head back to Dublin. I don't really do anything that night. Hang out at the hostel, watch a movie and again go to sleep early.

Day 4

Honestly, Dublin is pretty boring at this point. I can hardly tell you what I did on day 4. I went to the more modern part of Dublin. Mostly just shopping centers. I went to a barber shop and got my beard shaved (it was getting unruly). Finally, I go to bed early yet again. I have another 7am flight to catch.

Tips for Turkey (Istanbul)

Well, as I sit here in the airport waiting to leave Turkey I have had plenty of time to ponder my Turkish experience. For American's, navigating Western Europe is pretty simple. The culture doesn't really change enough to throw you off balance. I mean, after all it is still western culture. Turkey is a completely different experience, so here are some tips, tricks and warnings I learned while traveling to my first non-western culture.

Turkish People

1) When you get into town, the Turkish people are the friendliest you will ever meet. They don't wait a second to offer help. Here is the catch. In Turkey, if anyone is EVER offering to help you, they are also trying to sell you something. Not kidding, 100% of the Turkish people who approached me, offering help, tried to sell me.

2) Learn to ignore people talking to you. For a polite mid-western, this was torture. It went against my entire upbringing, but you have to. They will say, "hello" ignore it, they won't stop though. They say, "no no, just one question, where are you from?" They don't stop and every single time they try to sell you something. I started turning to these people and saying "okay, 5 Lira." They were confused. I said my time cost 5 Lira and I will stop and talk. While they are confused I walk away. Everyone is selling carpets. I told them I don't even have a home. One guy offered to help me get a home if I bought his carpet, another said it is big enough to make it into my own home. They don't give up.

3) For men - be careful with Turkish men. They are extremely jealous and have no problem resorting to violence. Honestly, if you see a Turkish guy in a group with girls, just ignore the girls. They believe they own the women they are around and you are trying to steal from them. At a cafe, two French girls started talking to me, they initiated. A Turkish guy was sitting with them, being a dick (probably why they started talking to me). He just stared at me, with silent contempt. Then the waiter moved them to a different part of the table and some Turkish guys came up and threatened me for having responded to the girls. Poor girls were trying to get away from the guy, as one explained to me later when he wasn't around and I saw her again.

4) For girls - avoid Turkish men. You want to meet people, have fun, make new friends, etc. Turkish guys love to offer to be a tour guide for cute foreign girls. Consider talking to any other guys not an option anymore. That and the guy won't leave you alone. He now feels ownership over you. Again, these girls complained he was just showing them the city, but not won't let them talk to any other guys without what happened to me, happening. Stick to other foreigners. Trust me.

Where to Stay

1) There are three parts to main Istanbul. Two parts in Europe, one in Asia. The Sultanahmet (old town), Taksim (new part) are both on the European side. The other side, they just call the Asian part.

2) Stay in Sultanahmet for at least a few days. There is where the Blue Mosque, Hagia Sophia, Basillica Cistern and Topkapi palace are. It is the main sight-seeing part of the city. Plenty of hotels, hostels, shops and restaurants. The Grand Bazaar is close as well.

3) If you want to experience more of the night life, also spend a few days in Taksim. This is where most of the bars and new shops are. Very modern, lively part of the city. It is still easy to go there during the evening if you want to stay in one place for your trip.

Spending Money

1) Negotiate everything. Not kidding. The only thing I didn't argue on was food and even then I did sometimes. People are constantly trying to get you into their store and shop. If you see something you like, pretend uninterested and first ask for a discount or free drinks, etc. They rarely list prices on things so they can mark them up. Offer lower and don't be afraid to walk away. Start walking and often they will stop you and keep lowering the price. Always bid under what you are willing to pay.

2) Don't really buy a carpet, unless it's magic, which it won't be. Trust me, I looked.. If you do, get it dirt cheap. They often sell them for around $2000, but talking to some Turkish people I met, often those rugs only cost them $250.

3) Public transportation is very cheap, but if you are hopping metro lines, you have to pay again to get to the second one. That is very different than the rest of Europe, when once you are in the tubes, you can switch between them as you wish. Cost is 2 Lira a ride. Same for the ferries.

4) Taxi's are not too expensive, but they scam you as much as possible. Ask for a flat fee to get from A to B. Otherwise they will drive you all over, say a lower price and charge you a higher one when they get there. Met a girl who was drove around in circles for about 15 minutes, paid 30 Lira, for a ride that should have been 3 minutes. Cab driver literally just drove around in circles first.

5) Alcohol is fairly expensive here, but food is pretty cheap.

Scams
There are two major scams, not counting the taxi one.

1) Everyone needs to watch out for this one. Women, often Gypsies, will be shoe shiners. They will accidentally drop their brush in front of you and wait for you to pick it up. When you do and give it back, they are so thankful and insist they shine your shoes. It is a custom, they must repay the favor. At the end, they charge you 10 Lira. I saw this one happen. If you see someone drop their brush, just stare at it and then the Gypsie. They will keep waiting, getting more frustrated because you are not falling for it. They expect people to react quick and become super obvious if they have to wait more than 5 seconds.

2) This one is mostly for guys traveling solo. It is a common one is Greece, too. A guy will come up to you speaking Turkish, you don't know it and he switches to English. Says he lost, he is also traveling solo (names different city) and starts a conversation with you. He ends up appreciating the conversation and says he knows a good bar right over here if you, also a solo traveler, want to join him. Once there, after a few drinks, him or sometimes large groups will hit you with the entire tab. The bar is in on it. They won't let you leave till you pay and I even heard rumors of people being beaten or had the cops called on them for trying to leave. Never go to bars with people you meet on the street. If you want to drink, find a local bar, makes friends by your self with the bartender there and then go to that one. They will get your back.

Must Visit Places

1) Blue Mosque (free)

2) Hagia Sophia (10 Lira)

3) Basilica Cistern (5 Lira)

4) Topkapi Palace (10 Lira)

5) Taksim Square (free)

6) The Asian side (2 Lira boat ride)

7) The Prince Islands (8 Lira for round trip on the ferry)

8) Galata Bridge and Tower

9) The Grand Bazaar

Dublin!

I get up at 4:30am, catch my cab to the airport and hop on my plane. The flight from Prestwick to Dublin is only about 45 minutes. It is pretty awesome seeing the coast of England and Ireland from the air.

I get in and hop on a bus to the city center. For once I print off directions from the bus drop off to the hostel, which is good because it would have sucked finding it otherwise. I get to the hostel around 9:00am. I can't check in until 2pm. All I want to do is sleep, but I guess that won't work.

I see there is a free walking tour at 11am. I sit around the hostel, eat some breakfast and kill time until the tour. The tour was pretty good. A large group and hard to hear, but defiantly worth going on. I meet two other Americans on it. One studying abroad in France and the other was living in Germany, working on the wine harvest and is traveling before going home. They had met at their hostel before the tour and have been hanging out. We all three get along pretty quickly.

After the tour we decide to do the Guinness Brewery tour. The guy has already seen it and heads back to the hostel. The tour is great. Self guided and paced, which I like. After the tour, you can go up to the sky bar, which has an amazing view of the city and get a free Guinness. The rumors are true. Guinness tastes much better in Ireland than the States. My favorite fact I learned at the Brewery was that the founder believed so much in his beer, when he signed his lease for the land the brewery is one, he signed it for 9,000 years. So yes, Guinness will still be there in Dublin for about 8,800 more years. Now that my friends is foresight.

I head back to the hostel and finally check into my room. I take a small nap and eventually head back down to the hostel common area. I met a pretty cool guy who from Canada who just finished high school and is back packing for a year. Hanging out with him and one other guy, who is French, we meet a group of 6 girls the States, who are studying in London together.

After a bit they invite us out with them to the bars. We head to the main and famous bar district in Dublin. We hop from bar to bar. One of the girls asks me to pretend to be her boyfriend because creepy guys keep hitting on her. Yay for being non-threatening!

After a late night at the bars, followed by pizza we all head back to the hostel and I finally sleep.

Last Day in Scotland or So I thought I Could Walk to My Hostel

I wake up, pack and catch a bus to Glasgow. I am not going to waste your time telling you about my incredibly boring wandering of Glasgow. Just know that you can leave it off of your list of cities you must visit. It is like Des Moines, great place to live and work, terrible to visit unless you know someone there.

The highlight of the day was when I asked a local what I should see in the city. She laughed and said, "Haha....um...have you tried Edinburgh?"

Now, I fly out the next morning to Dublin. The airport I fly out of is about an hour south of Glasgow in the city of Prestwick. I take a train down there, which arrives at the airport. Luckily for me the hotel I am staying at is close to the hotel, within walking distance. Or so I thought.

I find out the place on the map is on the exact opposite side of the airport from where I am. But still, not a terrible walk. It is dark, I am tired and I start walking. As I start walking it starts to rain. So there I am, with my backpack, walking along an airport by the highway, it's raining and dark. After about 45 minutes, maybe an hour of walking I get to the village that the hostel is in. I keep walking up and down unable to find it.

I finally go into a local tavern and ask for directions. They look at me and say, "Oh, you can't walk to here or at least you don't want to. You are only half there and it is out in the woods." You are kidding right? Gosh dang. They call a cab for me and I take it the rest of the way there. So I spent a solid 1.5 hours walking in the dark, cold and rain to just have to take a cab anyway.

I finally get to the hotel and luckily I have my own room for once. This place is out of season, so they just book the rooms at cost they say. I only paid about $20 for my own room. Sadly, I still have to be up 4:30am to catch my 6:30am flight.

I spend the evening sitting in the bar, which has Wifi. After awhile I am the only person left and start talking to the guy who works the front desk. He is a pretty nice guy. Just got an iPad himself and wants to talk about it. After awhile, he asks if I want a beer. He said one might magically appear if that is the case. Who am I to turn down free beer? I take it and have a drink with him before his shift is over.

Shortly after he leaves, I head to bed my self hoping to get at least 4 hours of sleep tonight. I can never fall asleep very early, but I can try.

Last Day in Edinburgh

I was really hoping to do a tour of the Scottish Highlands, but feeling as sick as I have been, I didn't want to sit in a bus for 12 hours. but I still want to see them, so I go down to the train station and ask about nice cities in the Highlands that are less than 2 hours away.

After getting a varied amount of advice I settle on a small tourist town about 2 hours North. I buy my train ticket round trip and wait for the next one. I thought it would be a simple ride, kind of boring, but with nice scenery. I was wrong, but in a good way.

I get into my seat, a nice Scottish girl around my age sits across from me. The other two seats and the four across from us are taken by Scottish ladies in their late 30's to age 60. The group is together and celebrating one of their 60 birthdays. They bring on plenty of food and alcohol. Mostly wine, beer and champagne.

Being the usually talkative person I am, I waste no time striking a conversation up with this lovely group. I get along with them instantly. They remind me so much of my Mom and her group of friends. What I mean by that is a bunch of women that don't care about their age, still think they are in their late twenties and know how to have fun, all while being nice people.

I start telling them about my adventures, travels, etc and they talk about their lives. All the while they shower me with free drinks and food. Eventually we pull in the girl sitting across from me. She seems pretty shy, but we get her to open up and have fun with us all. Needless to say, our little group was the life of the party on the train that day.

The saddest part was leaving. I had about 30 seconds to hop off the train while everyone said their goodbyes. They tried to convince me to just stay on the train with them for the rest of the trip (they had 2 hours more to go). And I was tempted. When I got off the train they were all pressed against the window waving. Some even pulled out handkerchiefs to wave as a joke. They pretended to cry. I pretended to run after the train holding my hand out as they went past. It was hilarious. We were all on the same page with the stereotypical train goodbye scene, one which I never thought I would live.

I got to the town and just walked around. It is really more of a village than anything. I had about an hour of daylight left (gets dark by 4pm). I walked down the main street, on a path in the woods, across a river, etc. I just spent my time reflecting and enjoying nature. There was something incredibly peaceful about this village, tranquil is the word.

As it got dark I started to wander the stores to pass the time for my train. I will only be in the village for about three hours. I start to get bored as places close. At one point I am sitting in the back of a store reading a book when I notice it has gotten really quite. I look around and no one is there. I walk up front and realized that the store closed about 15 minutes ago. Luckily, one person was still at the register closing up. The door was locked when I tried to leave and he had to come open it for me. I gave him a look of "oops?" and he gave me one of "you are kidding right...?" Yes, I managed to almost get myself locked into a small store in a village in Scotland.

Eventually, my train comes and I have no luck finding awesome people to sit with. I do luck out and get a section of seats to myself. I drift in and out of sleep on my way back.

Once I finally get back into Edinburgh, I just return to the hostel and call it a night. Tomorrow I take a bus to Glasgow.

A Morally Rattling Experience

The highlight of my time in Scotland was something that really got me thinking. I noticed a lot of people, around my age, asking for money all over the city. As a policy, I don't give money to people asking for it. I can never trust they will use it for what they intend and firmly believe I worked for this money. I disagree with giving out free money for no work. But I also firmly believe in providing food and shelter for people regardless of work. So I go in, buy a sack of bread and water and offer it to one of them. I half expected him to reject it or sneer at me for not giving money. I expected this because I have literally gotten those responses so often in the States. People have said, "I asked for money, not food."

This guy looks at it, eyes wide and says, "Yes please, thank you!" He physical reaction was mixed between trying to be calm and let me hand it to him and letting his hunger take over lunging for it. The next guy I meet I offer more food and a similar reaction. These people were truly grateful. They didn't expect it, but appreciated it.

This rocked me. I realized that these people literally are starving at times, in a first world country. This guy is young, medium sized and looks healthy enough. What got him here?

I wish I could give these people money and I guess I could, but I am backpacking on the cheap and running out of money far faster than I would have liked. I feel so spoiled and really, like an asshole holding onto it, though. Yes, it is my money, yes I am running out. but I am running out because I am backpacking around Europe. I know I will find a job when I get home and replenish my savings. But at the same time, if I give one person money and reject another because I run out of it, how is that fair?

Say what you want about me, but something I am obsessed with is being fair. If the world was fair, it would be a bette place. If people just treated others fairly, it would be an amazing place. I want to get what I earned and worked for. I want others to get the same. How can I give some here and not others? I can't just give it all up and have nothing left.....but then it hits me. Why can't I? Why shouldn't I?

This question has been wrecking me. I want to go back to a good paying job, but how can I justify getting a good paying job and enjoying my nice amenities when people are still suffering here? But even if I give everything I have, the impact overall will still be so small. I can help a few, but I will be obsessed with all the people that I am not helping. I will feel unfair again. As stupid as this sounds, I know I couldn't be a social worker or psychologist because I would focus on all the people I can't save, not the ones I can or did.

I decided that at worst, while I am unemployed back in Kansas City I can go buy fresh bread and offer it to homeless I encounter. They tend to frequent the same places.

I spent a lot of time thinking about should my next career choice be in charity, volunteer, etc? But I fear I would run into the same issues. Would I truly enjoy my job? I know I would be helping others, but it would truly bring me to realize all the people I can't help. Is it selfish to factor in my happiness?

I still struggle with this. Should I pursue a dream job, I am excited about, and truly want to do or should I pursue one that I could truly help needy people on a daily basis?

To be honest, right now I lean towards the further, not the latter. But we will see.

Edinburgh From Up High

Finally, though still sick, I am going on a good adventure today I decided. The weather is much, much nicer. Not quite sunny, but warmer and not raining.

I start my day off by walking to....crap, I forgot the name of the hill. Anyhow, it is a famous hill in the city. On top of it are a bunch of monuments. Edinburgh is famous for being a place of literary birth. Many famous writers in the 1800's came there to write and live. A famous one, convinced the city it needed more parks and got this land dedicated to being a park. The monuments don't really match very well. It's a random collection of different pieces that just stand out and make it all the more interesting.

The best one is the model of the Parthenon. It is just the front and a few pillars to the side. It is a full 1:1 replica though. I am sitting their reading about it and the story made me laugh out loud. During the mid-1800's Scotland was enjoying a great time of economic prosperity. They decided to build this temple since so much of city was built in that neo-classical/gothic Greek style. Strange, I know, but go with it. Well, after about 8 years of construction and being WAY over budget they just stopped. 150 years later they have never gone to finish it. So instead they just have the front pillars and top to the monument finished.

After walking around the hill, I make my way down. My second goal of the day is to climb Arthur's Seat. It is a small mountain dividing the old Edinburgh from the new. On the top of it is the "Seat" where the king was crowned. Really, it is just a stone.

I make my way down the hill in the direction of the mountain. I wander through random residential streets and end up next to protestors in front of the new parliament building. Apparently, this group of people is mad that they pennons might be cut because the government can't afford them. I guess bankrupting a country is more important that getting a very comfortable pension at the age of 55 for some Scotts.

I make my way to the base of Arthur's Seat and start my climb. It takes me about an hour and I am pretty exhausted. The cold I have is doing me no favors. The climb is beautiful and easily worth any discomfort experienced, though. It is pretty warm out today, to the point that I take my coat off. By the time I reach the top the sun has even come out to play for a bit, but the wind is heavy and forces me to put my jacket back one.

The funny thing is, when I get to the top, I look to one side that I see a lot of people coming from. So I guess, you can drive or take a bus up to hill and just climb the last 200 meters or so. I look at the 1000+ meters I climbed and just grumble to my self. Honestly, the climb is worth it. You don't appreciate things if you don't have to work for them.

On the top I decide this is the perfect plank. On the seat (people sit, stand, etc on it). I get a random guy to take my picture and it turns out great. Also, the guy is from San Francisco. He is on vacation for a few weeks in Scotland and England. We chat and start walking down the mountain together.

We decide to go the easy way because he was told there is a good bar on that side. We he confused, I follow him and we end up off the path walking through the woods. Now, part of me thinks, "Oh good, this is the day I die..." But this guy didn't give me the creepy vibe. It was pretty funny when in the middle of the woods we find a small camp, all naturally made. A wooden shelter, campfire pit, etc. Pretty creepy and we move on quickly. We end up in a meadow and then in a residential neighborhood, suburbs really.

We start wandering through them and at this point, without question, we know we are going the wrong way. Finally, we find a main street and ask a guy for the best way back to old town. He give us the bus number we need. We find the stop and hop on. It is a twenty minute or so bus ride.

My new friend and I part ways, exchanging e-mail addresses and I head back to my hostel exhausted and ready to lay down.

The rest of the night is pretty simple. More reading. I meet some people in the common room and talk to them. Even walk a movie with them. Nice people, from all over. A very pleasant night overall. The adventure is not just about what I see or who I meet, but just the experiences I have and today was full of good ones.

Rainy, Cloudy and Cold - The Traditional Scotland Experience

The next morning I wake up to the joy of rain. It is warmer than the day before, but still cold. Now it is just complimented with rain and clouds. Not a hard rain that soaks you, but one that keeps you sufficiently wet and uncomfortable.

I get ready and head to the castle gates to meet my new French friend. We get there, get tickets and start the tour. Sadly, it is raining and that means low visibility, which ruins some of the effect of the view. But still, we tour the museums, buildings and see the official Scottish Crown Jewels. Very cool, but kind of like comparing your artistic 8-year old nieces drawing to a Van Gogh. Impressive, but not a masterpiece.

After the tour we walk around the old town together. Get lunch, check out the old Parliament building and gift shop. Now, that day was a big day for me. Why? Because I am a nerd, that is why. After about 2.5 years wait, the final book in the Eragon series was coming out and there is no way I wasn't buying it. Luckily, my accomplice on today's adventure is a fellow reader of the fantasy genre. Not this series, but there was no judgement in my request to go book shopping.

We find a store and I buy the 1000+ page tome in my backpack. After this we keep walking for awhile and try to make it down to the bay. After some confusion, we figure out how but have run out of time. My friend has to be back at her hostel by 4pm to check on some work stuff. I am tired and feel crappy in the rain and so we part ways never to see each other again. ::Tear:: But thus is the life of an adventurer. (You can see I like to dramatize and romanticize my trip).

I go back to the hostel, the sun as almost set (we are far North) and just pull out my new book. In all honesty, I spend most my night reading it. I am sit, cold and tired. What better than reading a book? It just sucks that it happens to be in such an amazing city, which so much to do. But I am at the peak of my cold and really don't want try to make more new friends in my state of discomfort. Plus, who wants to hang out with the sick guy?

Well, disregarding my previous comment, later that night I make some more friends. I notice an American guy talking to two girls. They make a joke and I laugh, revealing I had just heard it. Afraid I sounded creepy, I apologize and instead they invite me to their conversation. The guy is from California and doing a similar trip to mine. One girl is from Liverpool, England and the other from Athens, Greece. After a bit I find out that they are sisters. 1/2 English, 1/2 Greek. Each raised in both, but decided to live in different countries. It was confusing because one sounded like she had a Greek accent and the other sounded pure British.

They are really nice and friendly and I enjoy the conversation. The guy is nice, but clearly is trying to impress these girls. For a little bit the conversations seems to be a competition for who has a bigger wang between me and this guy, except I didn't realize I was playing. When I caught on and realized he apparently cared about winning I let him go and feel like he won. He was a little socially awkward. Well intentioned, but still awkward.

After a bit the girls say they need to go, leaving the next day (bummer, got along with them). The guy tries to convince them to stay, but they are not having it. He keeps engaging them in conversation and they kept saying good-bye, politely, but progressively more annoyed. The sister that didn't get trapped in the loop keeps talking to me as she waits for her sister to escape. I promise not to abandon her to the wild before than. Finally, I notice a break in the guys rant and decide to throw the sisters a bone. I say, "Man, I am tired, I really need to go to bed, see ya." And the sisters spring on it and start to follow my lead to the dorms. The guy keeps following (same hostel) but now can't get the momentum. Pack, as I break away towards my dorm room, the sister mouths, "thanks!" And who says chivalry is dead? I will have you know the sister I was talking to was cute and interesting, but I sacrificed that conversation time for their well being. Modern day white knight, I am. Also, I was tired.

To Scotland and Beyond!

Okay, for now, just mostly to Scotland. I wake up early after a terrible night of sleep and have no doubt left, I am getting sick....again. What is it with my luck and going on my longer trips and getting a cold? First in Sweden, now here. Oh well, I guess.

I catch my train, though after a little confusion figuring out which train. All of the trains for this company, which has its own train lines were about an hour late. This is something easy to adjust to and understand for locals, for me, the system to explain this was about as foreign as the French language to me. Through pure luck I get on the right train though.

The airport is simple enough. I hang out for a few hours waiting for my flight. After a one hour flight I land outside of Edinburgh. I hop on a bus for a good 35-minute ride into the city.

Now, I wasn't prepared for Edinburgh. I had heard good things and was excited, but as I drove into the city my jaw dropped and I was blown away. Spoiler alert: Edinburgh is the most beautiful city I have ever seen.

The entire city is built to make you feel like you are in a giant castle/fortress. The architectural style is a neo-classical meets gothic Greece style and almost every building matches in color as if the entire city was quite literally built in a single day by the same group. To top it all off, there is a castle in the very middle of it....on a giant hill, siting on a cliff. You can't get more badass than that. That is the small mountains surrounding the city on one side and the bay/sea on the other.

Quite conveniently for me the bus drops me off 100 meters from my hostel. I go inside, check-in and decide to use my last few remaining hours of sunlight to walk around the city. Sadly, it is very, very cold. Not rainy, but cold and cloudy. My hostel is right in the city center. I walk through the old town, climbing the hill as I go and end up in front of the castle gates. At this point the sun is close to setting.

I am feeling pretty crappy at this point, so I pull out my iPad, get a drink and just relax at the bar in my hostel. After about an hour I hear they are going to do a trivia game in the bar. I guess it is a weekly thing on Mondays. Sounds good to me, I have no team, but better than just sitting around. Most of the groups tend to know each other. Surprising that the hostel bar is a common place for regulars. I later find out that more regulars come to this bar than travelers. Mixed blessing.

I name my group, "The guy in the black coat sitting by himself in the corner - DONT LOOK." Creative? Lame? Don't care! I had fun with it. As he is reading off team names and points I get quite a few chuckles. The whole point is everyone looks for me, sees me and then he reads the don't look. You might think that stupid, but I think that kind of thing is hilarious. That is a good summary of my sense of humor.

Shortly before the second round a group of four people in their early twenties walk into the bar. One of the girls comes over to me and says in a French accent, "Hey it is good to see you again." I run through my head when I have seen her and then realize she has mistaken me for someone else. I get that a lot. I swear I have the most average appearance in the caucasian world. That or am part of a giant government cloning project. Which honestly, I would be okay with, I just want answers government!

Anyhow, I politely inform her I am the wrong guy. She feels pretty embarrassed, but I explain that happens a lot. She is clearly very nice and not shy. I invite her group I join me for trivia. I explain it has only been one round, it's teams and I am going solo. They decide to get a drink and join. I quickly change our name to "Life is an Adventure - Now with friends!"

They story is, two of these girls are from France. They just met in their hostel (different one). One is studying in Ireland and the other is moving to Edinburgh on a whim to find a job. The other two guys, one from Spain and one from the Netherlands are also studying with the first girl in Ireland.

We play the game, get to know each other etc and do pretty good. We manage to come in third, but mostly just have a good time. The three students are going back to Ireland the next day, but the other French girl is obviously staying. Her and I made plans to meet up to go sight-seeing the next day. She hasn't toured the castle or done much and I prefer to not spend the entire time alone. Perfect combination!

Since the sweet mistress that is sleep decided to allude me the night before, after they depart I decide to get some sleep. Unfortunately for me my room is beyond freezing. I get into bed, under the sheet, cover, fully dressed and wearing my coat and am still too cold to sleep. Both heaters in the room seem to be broken....great. I go to the front desk, he can't fix it until the next day and just tells me to take an extra comforter. Which solves the problem well enough for the night. But the cold scores no points for me against my cold.

Leaving Bury and back to London

It is a Sunday and I am leaving Bury after a good weekend hanging out with an old friend. I leave pretty early in the morning. Well, early for me, 10am or so. It is cold out, colder than it has been since I got to England.

The English train system is screwy. First of all, it is damn expensive. Secondly, it is stupid. So a ticket from Bury to London was about 28 pounds. I had one change in Cambridge. So I looked at just booking a ticket to Cambridge from Bury and then Cambridge to London. 18 pounds. Cheaper to buy the two separate tickets....sounds good to me. So I bought a ticket to Cambridge and decided I will see the city that afternoon before heading back to London

I go to the train station and after some confusion find out the trains are not running. This is worrysome. After some mumbled English from an old man working there I found out they are running buses on the same routes. Takes more time, but I won't complain, I have nowhere to be.

After 1.5 hours I get to Cambridge. Only, I get to the train station, which is not very central. After some questions and reading signs I guess that I can hop on a bus and get to the city center. Luckily, I was right.

Now, Cambridge is a pretty small city, but it is very beautiful. It has a very ancient look to it. Exactly how you would imagine in so many ways. It has the University (Cambridge) all over, kind of like the entire city is its campus. You have the shops and homes lining narrow streets. Think Diagon Alley from Harry Potter and you are close to what Cambridge is like.

I walked around the city for a few hours, enjoy the sights, walked around the University areas I could access and felt I got my fill of the city and it was time to move on. Though, I left wishing I could go to school there. I loved KU, still do really, but I would have liked that more traditional University feel. Smaller, older, more traditions, etc.

After getting back to the train station I head to London. The train is packed full. Never fun, but oh well. I get to London and it is late and cold. I have started to feel a tickle in my throat, which worries me, but doesn't alarm me too much. I get checked into my hostel (right next to my other one). As the night goes on the tickle gets worse.

As I have to get up at 7am to catch a train to the airport I try to go to bed early. This does not prove easy. Around 2am some jerks come into the room, turn all the lights on and talk at a regular tone. Finally, someone tells them to shut up. They quite down, but keep the lights on while they get their stuff together. After about 20 minutes they hit the lights and go to bed as well. This was just good foreshadowing to my bad sleep. That tickle turned into a huge scratchy throat. I felt like I had a mild fever all night. Just restless, hot, etc.

Oh joy!

A Relaxing Weekend in England

The weekend in Bury St. Edmund was really great. It was relaxing. I was hanging out with an old friend in a quite town in England. Sometimes I think, "Tom, you are in a foreign country, see everything! Don't waste time!." But a part of me realized over time that when you are traveling for months on end, you want to stop feeling like a tourist and feel more at home sometimes. This weekend was great for that. I could have gone out and done more, visited more towns, etc, but instead Chris and I just hung out and it was great. We even joked about how it felt like old times....but we are in England.

During the day we walked around the city, Chris showing me the historical parts of the city. Mainly the ruins of an ancient church that you can walk around in. After that he needed to stop by his military base to pick a few things up. I joined him on his journey. It is about 30 minutes from where he lives. The base is shared between US Airforce and the Royal Airforce.

It was fun to go on base and see how things operated. We went to a local food joint and I got a real, American cheeseburger. Dang that sucker was good.

After that we went back to his place, hung out, had a few beers, dinner, etc. Then we decided to hit the pubs that night. We hopped from one to another enjoying some English beer along the way.

The highlight of the night was my social experiment involving women. So, I am not an unattractive guy, but I am pretty average. Height, looks, build etc. I am happy with it, but I am not the type of guy that girls see at a bar and think, "I want that guy to come hit on me." I am the type where you have a good conversation and two or three times of hanging out you see my attractiveness (or never want to see me again, goes either way).

I decided to try something different tonight in my approach. Chris and I meet a few English girls, all teachers near by, around our age. We are chatting, they are fairly disinterested, but enjoying the conversation. Problem was, more of them than of us (6-2 ratio). You may think that good, but it makes it harder to break them away.

Now when people ask me what I do I usually explain I left my job to back pack Europe. I worked in advertising and marketing for a software company before. This time around I phrased it differently. I said, "Oh I am just back packing around Europe for 3 months. Back home I had a software company that I helped turn profit and it was finally time to relax after too many 80 hour work weeks." From here the two girls I was talking to became extremely interested in everything I had to say. Why? Because they assumed I owned a company and was rich, which allowed me to travel.

The change in demeanor was incredible. They stopped talking to each other and only focused on me. I even tried to sabotage my self and it failed. I talked about "advantages of being a nerd," and they responded with, "Oh nerds are awesome, so cool!?" I said things like, "but software is really boring so.." and they would respond with, "No, I think it's all so interesting." It just blew my mind the completely different reaction it all had. I was both amused and saddened. Do I really need money to make people that much more interested in me?

After awhile a guy Chris and I were talking to came up and joined in. I used that as an excuse to talk to him and then Chris and I bailed on the group and went home.

I learned something that night. I need to get rich, fast! No, no, just kidding. I learned that if I am ever rich, when I meet girls (if still single) I am not going to tell them I am rich. I don't like how the attitude towards me changed. I knew that it was true, but had never personally experienced it my self before.

There is a famous saying on the Internet, almost the motto of the nerd.

"Disregard women, acquire currency." The first will always follow the second.

Update/Recap on My Journey

By popular demand - meaning Brett's suggestion - here is a recap of my trip so far and my tentative plan for the last 1.5 months.

I will list out the cities and countries in order of my travels and time spent there....roughly the time spent there, excuse errors, I am not looking at a calendar for it.

Trip 1
Rome, Italy (4 days)
Florence, Italy (2 days)
San Giminano, Italy (1 day)
Sienna, Italy (1 day)
Florence, Italy (2 days)
Bologna, Italy (1 day)

Trip 2
Budapest, Hungary (7 days)
Vienna, Austria (3 days)

Trip 3
Stockholm, Sweden (5 days)
Copenhagen, Denmark (4 days)
Hamburg, Germany (3 days)
Breda, Netherlands (3 days)
Rotterdam, Netherlands (1 day)
Amsterdam, Netherlands (3 days)
Brussels, Belgium (2 days)

Trip 4
Budapest, Hungary (6 days)
Nyiregyhaza, Hungary (2 days)
Budapest, Hungary (4 days)

Trip 5
London, England (4 days) +Stonehenge
Lavenham, England (1/2 day)
Bury St. Edmund, England (2 days)
Cambridge, England (1/2 day)
London, England (1 day)
Edinburgh, Scotland (4 days)
Scottish Highlands (1/2 day)
Glasgow, Scotland (1 day)
Dublin, Ireland (4 days)
Western Ireland (1 day)
Paris, France (4 days)

Trip 6
Budapest, Hungary (5 days)

Trip 7
Munich, Germany (2 days)
Ravensburg, Germany (3 days) + Neuschwanstein Castle
Tubingen, Germany (1 day)

Trip 8
Budapest, Hungary (here now).

I am in Budapest until the 16th of December, when I go to Istanbul, Turkey for 7 days. During my time here in Budapest, I will travel around Hungary a little. I will hopefully go visit Bratislava, Slovakia and Prague if I can.

Then I will travel to Frankfurt, Germany to spend Christmas with the Shaw family. Then back to Budapest on the 28th of December. I will wait here for friends and family for Matt and Edit's wedding. I will act as a tour guide. Then we have the wedding on January 7th. Then to Zurich, Switzerland on January 10th and back to Kansas Jan. 12th.

It is a weird feeling. Part of me feels like I just started my journey, while the other part feels like I have never lived outside Europe. I have grown and changed as a person here. I have struggled to figure out who I am and who I want to be and how to get there. I have confronted so many of my inner demons. Some battles lost and others won.

Matt Shaw asked me this question when I got here, "Do you feel like Europe is normal and the United States is a fantasy land that you can't really picture fully yet?" At first I told him no and I didn't get it. Then one day I realized I felt so comfortable in Europe, I felt at home. Even though I was seeing new and amazing things every day, it didn't seem weird or foreign, it felt real. Then I tried to imagine Kansas and the United States and it felt unreal. Kind of like thinking about a cartoon. You can remember it, but only certain details, as if the little things have no definition at all....it was just a fantasy land. Now I understood what Matt meant.

Either way, the Tom that left Kansas is not the Tom that is coming back, but I am who I want to be. I feel like I have not only found my path and embraced it, but taken control of it and am ready to drive it forward. In short, I am happy again, but this time the happiness won't leave me because it is not based on anyone other than myself.